How to Make Love in the Boardroom 

People are looking everywhere for ways to feel valued and appreciated. We want to be surrounded by others who are mindful of our needs in a way that says, "I hear you." We want to be in the presence of other people who joyfully give us the freedom to be authentic and walk in our truth. We want to feel honored by other human beings with acts of integrity and compassion. We want our creative expression to be celebrated and recognized by others, be forgiven easily without judgment, and have other people take responsibility for their actions. To sum it up in one sentence, in our personal lives, we say, "I want to be loved." 

In business, we don't call it love. Oh no, that wouldn't be politically correct. The word love may not go over well in the boardroom. Heaven forbid we use a word that might make people feel uncomfortable. Ironically, what makes people uncomfortable is what every human being is looking for from their leader and company--love. Instead, in business, we call love "engagement." You see, when people feel loved, they want to give love. 

Today, people feel the void of love more than ever. Most businesses have yet to acknowledge that the only way to have an engaged culture is to have leaders who show up and live high-character values that include mindfulness, compassion, forgiveness, integrity, and responsibility—in other words, leaders who can show acts of love. Fred Kiel's research proves that high-character leaders produce 3X more ROI than low-character leaders. Love wins again. 

What gets in the way of leaders being able to show acts of love?  Fear of becoming vulnerable. 

Vulnerability is the magic ingredient to showing acts of love and receiving the love that others show. Not only is vulnerability the magic ingredient, it's the hardest thing for a business to attain because it requires not intellect but heart. Vulnerability is the willingness to do something without a guaranteed result, having the courage to be imperfect, having the ability to be kind to ourselves first, and believing that the things that make you most susceptible and weak to the world are what make you most beautiful. The key to joy, love, and happiness is vulnerability.  

In business, vulnerability is often overshadowed by fear and shame. As a means of survival and protection from fear and shame, people have become experts in denial. People still support what they know is wrong for self-protection, even when it harms another person. People pretend they are what they’re not to fit in. People put themselves on a conquest to perfect their existence rather than honoring their imperfections, hiding what makes them most beautiful. All the while, at the core of our human nature, we want to be vulnerable and feel connected. We want to feel loved. 

Vulnerability is the only way people feel loved, and living with high-character values is how love is shown. That said, vulnerability always follows character—it will never happen the other way around. When leaders show up living high-character values and exhibiting acts of love, the culture feels safe. When a culture feels safe, people are willing to let their guard down, become vulnerable, and give love right back to the business.  

Vulnerability and high character values are the solutions that create a healthy, high-performing culture. Vulnerability and high character are the new change leadership.  

We're living in a new world. I like to think it's a world based on love.